I am someone who hates to be alone.
And fastfood.
However, I decided to eat alone in Westmall Burger King today.
Strange.
Looking at the food on my tray, I regretted my choice. Instead of getting my usual Turkey Bacon Double, I thought I should have some vegetables in my meal, thus I decided to try the Teriyaki Whopper meal. In addition, I ordered another ice-cream which cost $1 only with purchase of a meal. Call me cheapskate. After unwrapping the humongous burger, I only wished that Dear was there with me.
While I was eating the burger, my thoughts started to stray again as I stared blankly at the walking passer-by through the glass fenestration.
I felt so aimless.
Right in the middle of the day at 3pm, I was having lunch by myself while others were busy working and leading a meaningful life.
I felt so pathetic.
A Korean tai-tai with 2 children sat at a table in front of me. I started to wonder if I would ever be like her. A full-time housewife who sacrifices her career to spend time with her children. I doubt I am capable of that. Financially and psychologically.
But what am I to say all these now? I don’t even know if I will have a career. Not to mention marriage or even children.
Looking at the people around me:
My schooling friends are planning for their graduation trip and some have even gone for it.
My working friends are earning more and more money.
My attached friends are planning for marriage.
My married friends are happily married and having children.
Me?
Nothing.
I am just living a day by a day. Waiting for things to happen. Hoping that things will turn out the way I hope.
What am I going to do now?
I guess I will not be able to have an answer for the time being.
For now, and once in my life, I just want to stop thinking about the future.
But this sense of loss is killing me.
I guess I have no choice but to live with it.
Once the truth unveils on 30th May, I shall start thinking about it again.
Hopefully.
:: CLEANSING ::
Origins A Perfect World
B.Liv Glow and Shine
B.Liv Squeaky Clean
:: SKINCARE ::
Origins A Perfect World Toner
Botos Serum
B.Liv Shrink and Tighten
B.Liv Off With Those Heads
:: EYECARE ::
Origins High Potency Eye Cream
Faceshop Collagen Eye Patch
Shu E Lash Repair
:: COSMETICS ::
BRTC BB Cream
Skinfood loose powder
Loreal Mineral powder
Clinique Blusher
Majolica Mascara
:: MONTHLY SUPPLEMENTS ::
Meiji Collagen
Multi-vitamins
Vitamin C